Thanks, Sky Daddy!
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Thava the dragonborn awoke with a start on the all-but-comforting ceramic tile of a dark palace. Her mind frazzled, she quickly began the process of recollecting herself, acquainting herself with her surroundings and reminding herself of her life situation. Arms, check. Legs, check. Head…? Yes, that seemed to have grown back. Check.

Wait a minute… 'grown back?' Something was off about that phrase, especially in relation to one's head…

Ah yes. It was no small wonder that Thava had little memory of where she had just been or what she had been doing, seeing as how she had just had her head chopped off. She stood up and cracked her neck, just to be sure it still worked, and surveyed the room around her. The hard and cold tile below and the stone slab she called a bed returned her memory to her at once.

There was no mistaking the cruel and unforgiving accommodations that had been afforded her in the mansion of the goddess Shar. How she had ended up in the mansion of the goddess of darkness was another story entirely, and not one that we can take the time to tell. What mattered now was finding Shar, and getting herself put back together to the best of her ability.

Thava opened the door to the room, and peered out into the expansive hallway that lead out from the foyer of the mansion. Which direction was it to Shar, again? Left, or right? Shrugging, she chose the right path, as it was the only option that was right, and left her cold and uncomfortable dungeon of a room.

She had hardly taken a step, however, when a familiar voice startled her.

"Ah, Thava. I see you've finally awoken." said Shar, sipping a cup of tea.

Thava sighed, clutching her heart and measuring her breaths, in an attempt to hide her panic.

"Yes, hi. Good morning, Shar."

"It's evening." mused Shar, without taking her eyes off of the liquid within her teacup.

"Good evening, then." groaned Thava. "Um. Do you know what happened to me?"

"You failed. You were caught, and you were executed," snapped Shar. "In public, no less. Any further undertakings regarding the city of Briaxsall must now be handled by another one of my underlings."

"I'm sorry, Shar." muttered Thava, gripping nervously at her arm.

"Sorry won't cut it this time, Thava. Briaxsall was a grand opportunity, and you went and ruined it for me." said Shar. "How can you ever expect to make it up to me?"

"I can make it up to you, I promise! I won't go and get my head cut off again. Or get caught." said Thava, beseeching her goddess for any chance of forgiveness.

Seeing that Shar did not seem to be amused, she sighed, as she remembered the magic phrase she was taught to use in situations like these.

"Pretty please, with a cherry on top, will you forgive me, Shar?" she asked.

Yet still Shar did not look amused. "I'm afraid I don't know who this 'Shar.' you speak of is."

Thava groaned. "Please forgive me, Mistress?"

A smirk broke out on Shar's purple lips.

"You are forgiven, darling. But you must still find a way to make it up."

Thava brightened immediately, and wagged her tail. "Thank you, Mistress. I'll do anything you want! Well, except for meeting you in your bedroom, but— yeah."

"How would you like to make it up to me? Errands for a week? Cleaning the stables? Caring for the sorrowsworn? Or perhaps… tea party with Navreht?" asked Shar.

Thava grimaced. "None of those sound particularly great… I was thinking that maybe I could make it up to you by um… trying again?"

"Already? But you've only just failed me." snickered Shar. "Though, I do have another mission that has been sitting on the back-burner… I suppose the duty will fall to you."

"Oh boy! What is it?" asked Thava.

"Another reconnaissance mission. You will head to the Temple of Helm in the city of Neverwinter, and you will get the council there to trust you. You will hire yourself on as an evaluator, and with any luck, they will assign you to a team. Your job is to befriend that team and learn as much as you can about the Temple of Helm and their involvement with the Doors." said Shar.

"Sounds easy enough." said Thava.

"It may seem easy on the surface, but be cautious. Helm has been a thorn in my side for millennia." said Shar.

"Well, luckily, I am an expert at removing thorns." said Thava. "I got stuck in a bramble last week and nearly bled out."

"Yes, yes, very well. Get on with it then. Do not fail me this time, or when you return, I shall turn you inside out and leave you to dry for the next week." said Shar, waving her hand passively.

"Again?! That'd be the third time this month!" cried Thava.

"I know. One would think you'd learn by now. Now, go on, get." said Shar, shooing Thava away.

And like that, Thava found herself stumbling out of the portal to the Shadowfell, and into a back alley in the city of Neverwinter.

"So, am I in?" asked Thava, shifting in her seat nervously.

The high elf man sitting across the desk from her surveyed the papers she had handed him. The papers that were absolutely, in no way shape or form, forged. After a few minutes, he sighed, and put his hand to his temple.

"U-um… are you alright?"

He sat up quickly, and waved a hand vaguely in the air as he said "Yes, yes, I— I'm fine. Just a little migraine, is all."

"Oh. Do you want some fantasy-aspirin?" asked Thava.

"No, I only use fantasy-ibuprofen." he said, as he pulled out a bottle of pills from his desk and shook it. Frowning, he opened the bottle, and peered into its empty expanse. "And it seems I have run out. I'll have to ask… what was that boy's name again… oh, it doesn't matter right now. Yes, I'll take the fantasy-aspirin. Thank you."

Thava fished another bottle of pills out of her bag and handed them to the high elf man, who took one and downed it swiftly.

"Sorry about that," he said. "It's been a very stressful week."

"Oh? How come?" asked Thava.

"Well, you know— we have a lot of employees around here, and they can be a bit… difficult to manage sometimes. We suffered flooding in one of our dorms just the other day, and the repairmen I hired demanded so much gold for their service. Thankfully, it isn't my problem, the one who caused it offered to pay for it herself and— and… and I gave her all of the gold she has. Damn." rambled the man.

"It sounds like you've got a lot on your hands." noted Thava.

"Yes, I suppose I do. What did you say you were here for again? Ah, yes— an evaluator. We don't have many of those… never really thought of them as necessary… but, the more I think about it, the more I think there might be a party after all that could use some evaluation."

"Really? I look forward to working with them!" exclaimed Thava.

"You shouldn't— I mean, it's not that they're mean people or anything, but they're quite a handful to deal with."

"Oh. Well, I assure you, I am very good at my job." said Thava, giving him a nervous grin.

"Yes… I can see that." he said, with the air of one who has not been thoroughly convinced. He looked back down at the papers in his hand, and sighed.

"I suppose your qualifications do exceed the expectations of the job, however, so… what the heck, you're hired."

"Yay!" exclaimed Thava, pumping a fist in the air.

The high elf man held a hand to his temple and cringed.

"Sorry…" muttered Thava. "Yayyyy…!" she whispered.

"Yes, yay indeed. Less work on my hands is always better."

The high elf man stood up and offered his hand to Thava. She took it gingerly, making sure not to scrape him with her claws, and gave it a firm shake.

"My name is Uthemar Ethanasath, and I'll be your boss starting from today." he said.

"Oh, my name is Thava! Er, just Thava."

"Right. Of course. What is it with new hires and refusing to give me their last names…?" Uthemar wondered aloud.

Thava shrugged.

"In any case, it isn't a problem. Multiple of your new clients have the same issue. You've already got something in common. Now, if you'd follow me, I'll show you around this temple…"

All in all, the Temple of Helm was a very large, but not overly impressive building. In her time spent on Toril, Thava had seen many more impressive constructions, though she could not lie and say that Neverwinter was not the most impressive city in the humble continent of Faerun.

Thava didn't know much about Helm himself, but was told that he was the lead god of this temple— go figure, seeing as how it was named after him— and that he was once a very honorable paladin who had become elevated to godhood a very long time ago. The Temple was erected to worship him and commit deeds in his name; the kind of vigilante justice that kept the world running safely, banishing all evil in the land.

Infiltrating such a holy site while knowing about her true nature was a nerve-wracking experience for Thava, but her adorable appearance and her innate charm allowed her to happily blunder through most of the tour without issue.

The biggest problem so far had occurred when she had met a close acquaintance of Uthemar's — a high achieving member of another party, thankfully separate from the one she had been assigned to evaluate, if only because it meant that she would not have to deal much with the awkwardness that would ensue hereafter.

The paladin had reached out to shake her hand and introduced himself as "Gerald Greysweats," a human paladin that worked closely alongside the council.

"Th-Thava. Just Thava." she replied, introducing herself in return as was customary.

The two stood there in silence for a few moments, unsure how to continue the conversation from there.

Tripping over her words and searching for any source of small talk, she blurted out: "You know, it's been a while since I've seen a human."

Gerald raised his eyebrows. "Really? They're all over the place here in Neverwinter."

"Well, I was told humans are going extinct."

"Th-they are?!"

"Yeah. Um, we're eating them."

"You're— you're eating them?" he asked.


"Wow. Um, okay. Uh. You're not going to eat me, right?"

Thava blushed, and waved her hands frantically. "No, no! Of course not! I'm just here to evaluate."

"Okay… If you get hungry, though… um, I'll make sure to stay out of arm's reach."

He laughed nervously, and turned to speak with Uthemar, while Thava steamed embarrassment in the background.

"So, we've got a new evaluator? What, am I not doing a good enough job?" Gerald jested.

"No, no, Gerald, you're doing fine. I just thought— we've both got a lot of work on our hands and well, she came in asking for a job and was just the right level of enthusiastic about it. I figured it would do us both well to have someone else watching over our new hires." said Uthemar.

"Ah. Yeah, I guess so. I still get to go down there and bang on their doors every morning though, right?"

"Yes, if you want to." sighed Uthemar.

"Hell yeah."

"—so your health plan is 'Don't die?'" came the deep voice of a mature-sounding woman.

"Yes, because if you die, we can't exactly help you." replied the voice of Uthemar.

"Fair enough."

Thava stepped into the room of the council and made her way towards the sound of voices. Today was her big day! It had taken a solid week of touring, meeting and greeting, and being shown the ropes of how things worked around the Temple, but at last she would be getting into the real juicy part of her mission.

As she stepped out, Uthemar turned his head, and noticed her. "Ah, there you are. That would be your evaluator," he said, turning back to the party.

"An evaluator? We've only been here for a week." asked a seemingly-human woman in a raspy voice.

"Yes, well, in that one week you have already proven yourselves to be a hazard to public safety—"

"Us? That wass all The Oracle'ss fault." the woman continued. Thava noted a bit of a hiss on the end of her words.

"She may have been responsible for the most major incident as of late, but I can't say that the rest of you are not without fault."

"You know what, fair enough."

"Um, hi." said Thava, giving a nervous wave.

"Hi." said the raspy-voiced woman, who Thava could see as she turned to face her was not quite fully human. Her face had snakelike features and across her skin small patches of scales grew at irregular intervals. "Uh, nice to meet ya. My name's Ge'ah."

Thava waved. "My name's Thava."

A stout dark-elf woman spoke to Thava next, and she quickly recognized her as the voice from earlier, who had been asking about health plans.

"It is nice to meet you, Thava. My name is The Oracle, but you can call me Oracle for short. This here is my friend…" she trailed off as she gestured to a very large orcish woman standing behind, who must have measured in at twice her height. "Borc."

The orc waved. "Hi." she said, in a gruff voice.

"H-hi." said Thava, only mildly intimidated since her own height almost matched the orc's.

"And you've already met Ge'ah." continued The Oracle.

"Don't forget about Aeya." said Borc, waving her hand to the empty air.

Thava looked nervously at the blank spot where the large orcish woman seemed to be convinced another person was standing.

Ge'ah leaned in and whispered to her: "We had another party member, but sshe died. Borc can't sseem to let go. Don't worry too much about it."

Thava merely nodded, and said "U-um, it's nice to meet you, Aeya…" trailing off as she gestured to the void.

Borc smiled, seemingly content with this outcome, and returned her arm to her side.

introduction to the party. involves the Ranchscrancher. and then they go out and meet venomfang and thava evaluates the party to be very inefficient but they get the job done, and come back with another apple I think and thava eats it unveiling her previous status as a spy and a vampire. now mortal, she agrees to work with the temple as long as they don't kill her and uthemar is like ugh ok. just go in jail for a bit because we need to question you and make sure you're safe to have around

short summary of thavas adventures in jail and the few outings she got to go on with the party. while in jail, another member of shar's underlings shows up and she kills him for failing his mission. then, she is visited by the party she was previously evaluating and an arrangement is made with uthemar that thava can come out with them on adventures as long as she agrees to worship helm and is always with at least one member of the party.

the part where we kill tiltithana and ask helm if thava can help. helm says "Go and walk in the light of righteousness." and thava says "Thanks, Sky Daddy!" and it ends like that.

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